138. You've Been Thunderstruck

Today’s comic is about the pitfalls of being the superhero Captain Marvel. I thought about this after I watched the DC Animation movie Superman/Shazam, which I really enjoyed.
This doesn’t have anything to do with the comic, but I just thought I would mention that I got King Kong from Gamefly.com. I would just like to say that it's one of the biggest pieces of crap I have ever played. The achievement whore inside me will not let me send it back since I can get 1000 points for it.

Hallelujah Holla-Back,
Nick
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132. Same As It Ever Was

At a certain time in my life, I proclaimed that Alan Moore was my god. He created master pieces like the Watchmen, Batman: Killing Joke, V for Vendetta, and the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. As most of you comic book readers know, he eventually became a creator who ditched the mainstream entirely and started to rant about his love affair with magic. As every year passed, I noticed that instead of coming up with work that blew me away, he would just do an interview damning the comic book industry for ripping him off and riding his coat tails. To this declaration by Moore, I say "fuck you Moore." While his stories are well written and intriguing, he didn't create the characters or sand box that he used by Marvel and DC to become famous. The Watchmen weren't original characters, they were his take on Charlton Comics characters. Swamp Thing, Superman, Miracle Man, and especially the League are all creations of other people. So while the Watchmen and Killing Joke are master pieces, Alan Moore should stop tearing down people like Geoff Jones and Grant Morrison and realize that they are just doing what he did years ago.

Bonus: What Harry Potter spell is Mr. Moore casting?

Power Stance; Boom, Boom
James Alvarez

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125. All the World's a Stage

When it was announced that Henry Cavill would be the next Superman, I was glad to hear that not too many people upset over the choice of the Tudors actor. My main concern was whether they'd get a good actor who wasn't too famous to distract from the Superman character. Of course, some of the ignorant people also took to the Internet claiming that "Superman isn't a Brit!" I agree, he is a fictional alien character. Now, when I look over at the Spider-man reboot, I would have to say I want no part of it. His costume looks like an utter mess and removes me from ever wanting to see it. I don't care that the actor isn't from the U.S. either, although his gigantic melon head is a little off-putting.

James "Get me Mackey" Alvarez
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117. An Apology to Our Fish Friends

In case you didn't know, last week we seem to have offended three or four Aquaman fans. They screamed from their bathtubs: "YOU ARE HACKS!," AQUAMAN RULES," and YOU GUYS ARE NO BETTER THAN FAMILY GUY." Well, to be a hack would be to make a joke about his inadequate powers when compared to the rest of the JLA. Also, to compare us to a cartoon that has millions of viewers on a weekly basis and created many spin offs and is funnier than a lot of stuff that is considered comedy, I say "thank you." The comic was not really a slam against Aquaman, but more a slam against the braggy high-school-like drunkard that dwells in your office. I happened to enjoy Aquaman during Grant Morrison's run of the JLA.

Now with that being said, Aquaman is a boring character overall that hasn't really done much. Everybody makes fun of Aquaman because he is a nothing when fighting along side a Superman, Batman, Green lantern and Wonder Woman. I think there is a reason that he has had so many titles debut and then get canceled: his fan base is minimal! He is a novelty and fills the need for some sort of underwater type that is called upon every few years.

I'm a huge fan of many DC and Marvel characters and yet, if someone were to make fun of those characters I would either laugh at it or not care. These are fictional characters, people, and when you hold them so sacred to your heart, you just become an unlikeable zombie. So, in the words of my co-writer/brother Nick, I would like to say: You fan boys that can't take a joke can go fuck yourselves. Fanboys that can take a joke need not fuck themselves.

-Love James J.
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099. Make Mine Amalgam

This one was done by Nick, and it was something he created for a Toplessrobot.com contest. They asked to create an amalgam character with some humor and I loved this idea greatly. While it got no love on the site in written form, I thought that bringing it new life in comic form might be more appreciated.

-James Alvarez

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092. I'd Like to Be Under the Sea

I have always thought that the Creature of the Black Lagoon was the worst of all of the Universal Monsters. His strength comes from being in the water, which makes him useless in most circumstances. Then I thought that no one would know his pain, except maybe Aquaman.

- James

064. In Your Satin Tights Fighting for Your Rights

Last week, DC revealed a new design for Wonder Woman: pants and a jacket, instead of the skirt and corset-type top. Comic fans were upset by the news, apparently, and aren't handling the proposed change well.

To me, Wonder Woman isn't a great character, and not many people actually like her. If this wasn't the case, her book wouldn't be a low-selling comic and they wouldn't have to try and re-invent her look in the first place. All the crap that fans are giving is based on nostalgia for a character who they pretend to like. When it comes down to it, the fact that nobody buys the comic means there aren't many true Wonder Woman fans, anyway.

It's time to let go of the nostalgia and see where they will go with it before they end up reverting back to the old design in two years or less.

James

042. Step Into My Office

I feel that it's good for superheroes to have some sort of guideline or code when doing their business, but is it really worth believing in your justice system if you have arrested these super villains thousands of times only to have them escape and murder more people?? Super villains aren't afraid of Batman, so he is ineffective. The only way to stop crime in this city would be with an equally psychotic murderer (ie: the Punisher).

029. The Knight is Dark and Lonely

Today, the Gentlemen look into Batman's obsession with believing he's a loner, when in reality, has the biggest supporting cast in comics. Enjoy.